Bellicose

First thing I've decided -> I am watching When Harry met Sally tonight. I have to, because otherwise I'll feel melancholy even in my sleep. It will be my second time in two months. Maybe it's therapeutic.

Today I am sneezy. Extremely allergic to the world. Today I am also being stoic, impartial to both pleasure and pain. Trying to remain submissive to my destiny. We'll see how that turns out. Lol. I didn't actually plan to be emotionally void today it's just kinda how my night and morning have been panning out. By the time I get off work I'll be ready to run out my thoughts as I always do at the gym. This week has pretty much made me feel as though I've been hung out to dry by the universe. Ya, like I'm sopping wet shirt dangling from a clothesline about to be ripped off by some mean and inconsiderate animal and then torn to shreds just for fun. Haha wow, how cynical am I?! Maybe I'm just learning to not let things bother me as much or maybe I'm just trying to do what's best for me. I've been considering a lot lately and I've also been taking time to be a bit selfish. I don't necessarily believe that there's anything wrong with that. It's typically not my nature to be so unfortunately I let the compassionate side seep through too much and I get twisted around someone else's needs. I'm slowly managing to maintain a consistent balance.